Tag: motivation

A Fast That Changed Me

On By KKIn Uncategorized

Last week, I set out with a simple intention.

I decided to go meat-free for one week.

That decision quickly evolved into something deeper.

By Monday, I committed to a one-meal-a-day, meat-free fast, eating only at 6:00 p.m. I completed Monday and Tuesday successfully. Hunger was present, but manageable. I felt focused. Clear. Grounded.

Then Wednesday came.

By mid-day, the hunger intensified in a way I hadn’t expected. Instead of pushing through another eating window, I listened inward and made a new decision: Wednesday would be a full water-only fast.

That’s when everything shifted.

By Wednesday night, my senses became incredibly acute. Sounds were louder. Thoughts were sharper. Emotions moved through me more freely. My body was tired, but my mind and spirit were wide awake. Sleep barely came.

Thursday morning arrived, and I knew—deep in my body—that it would be time to break my fast at the 48-hour no-food mark. Still, I held the line until 6:00 p.m.

It wasn’t easy.

But I made it.

At 6:00 p.m., I ate pizza with vegetables and cheese—no meat. The effect was immediate and profound. My body relaxed. My nervous system softened. A wave of calm and bliss washed over me, and for the first time in days, sleep found me.

This morning, I woke up still a little sleepy—but deeply grateful.

Grateful that I had the strength to finish.
Grateful that I honored my body.
Grateful for what the fast revealed.

My Intentions—and the Results

I entered this fast with three intentions:

  • To gain mental clarity
  • To heighten my spiritual senses
  • To cleanse and heal my body

All three occurred.

But the lessons went even deeper.

I learned that I have more discipline than I ever believed.
I learned that I am more grateful than I ever knew.
I learned that even the most basic, simple things in life—like food—should never be taken for granted.

I gained a small glimpse into what it feels like for those who do not have consistent access to food, and that awareness has stayed with me.

I learned that my body is a temple, and what I put into it matters—not just physically, but mentally and spiritually.

What Carried Me Through

During the hardest moments, I leaned on three things.

First, I thought of Jesus in the desert.

Then, I thought of those who do not have the luxury of eating every day.

Then, I returned to God’s Word.

And when it felt hardest of all—when fear, pain, grief, shame, nightmares, and emotional turbulence surfaced—I anchored myself in love.

The love I have in my life.
The love I have for others.
The love that sustains us all.

There were moments during this fast when temptation appeared in many forms. But each time it did, I called upon Jesus—and each time, I was carried through.

The Outcome

This fast was successful in every way that mattered.

My heart has softened.
My body feels renewed.
My spirit is singing.

I’ve learned how certain foods affect my mind, body, and spirit, and I feel better equipped to navigate a healthier, more intentional version of myself moving forward.

This wasn’t just about abstaining from food.
It was about discipline.
Awareness.
Gratitude.
Faith.

And for all of it—

Praise to God.

Kristi’d

On By KKIn UncategorizedLeave a comment
Photo by Paige Cody on Unsplash

*If you or a loved one feels that they are a victim of being Kristi’d, please follow me on Facebook @justkritisti82.*

“You just Kristi’d me,” he stated when I told him something real. I didn’t know what it meant when he said it. So I thought about it for awhile.

And this is what I came up with.

Being Kristi’d means you’re going to be heard and seen and supported and pushed and challenged and rooted for and cried with and laughed with and adventured with and fought for and actually loved.

It means you’re going to be shown the brighter side of every dark shadow this world can throw at you.

It means you’re going to be given truthful feedback and a different perspective so you can experience life on a deeper level.

It means you’re going to hear lots of music and new ideas and insane ramblings that will ruffle you up a bit. It means occasional wild nights. Occasional nights at the beach. Occasional (well let us just be really real and go with “perpetual”) Netflix nights. Whiskey nights. Wine nights. Tea nights. Early nights. Late nights. But they’ll always we GOOD nights.

It means getting random inappropriate memes. It means getting drunk dialed. It means backrubs and emotional healing. It means laughing a lot.

But most of all, being “Kristi’d” means you’re gonna feel ALIVE.

So if you’ve ever been “Kristi’d” consider yourself extremely blessed. Very few get the impossibly rare opportunity. 💋💋💋

Thoughts on Perspective.

On By KKIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

Despite the normal stressors as well as the not-so-normal stressors I would have to say life is actually pretty great. I’ve got TONS to be grateful for, especially my children. I’ve got a handful of amazingly weird and chaotic and beautiful and straight up REAL friends. I’m blessed with a supportive and loving family. I have a job I enjoy. I have a home decorated in art and love and music. I have strength and passion and curiosity. I have self-respect (which, as it turns out, is a very rare quality) and self-love. I have everything I need and most of what I want.

If you asked me 2.5 years ago, I would have told the a different story. I was in a bad place. It was the first Thanksgiving separated from my husband with our family split apart for the first time in 8 years. It was foreign, and empty, and terrifying. I was on my own with 3 young boys and not a clue how I was going to do it. They spent Thanksgiving Day with him. That was the first Thanksgiving in my life that I spent completely alone (aside from the bottle of red wine that accompanied me on the couch) crying in the dark.

I felt so alone. So wrecked. The one thing I valued most in life…my precious family…was completely torn apart. All my perfect dreams of the life my children were going to have were shattered. With that, so was my heart. “Nothing,” I thought, “would ever be good again.”

I thought then that day-to-day life was a challenge to cope with. The holidays…way worse to cope with. The traditions I had worked so hard over the years to build for my children…completely destroyed. Yup, nothing was ever going to be the same.

I struggled for months and months and months. I changed jobs. Took a significant pay cut. Gave up all of my hobbies and dreams. I went from a healthy 2-income household to half of a 1-income household, on my own, with 3 kids. I was learning how to juggle full time work, any semblance of a normal social life I could find, shopping, cooking, cleaning, homework, showering regularly, praying, meditating, paying bills on time, and laundry. Ugh…the laundry. I was exhausted. Running on fumes. Frightened of how much time I had before I couldn’t keep going anymore. It was pretty bad.

I went through a relationship during that time. The not-so-good kind. I realized later it was simply a distraction from the reality I faced. Something to get lost in for awhile. Another excuse. Another mistake. Another massive heartbreak. Another delusion.

I drank. A lot. I thought about running away. A lot. I cried alone on my bedroom floor. A lot. Life was looking pretty unpromising.

Then one day I got pissed off and tired of feeling like life was going to always be an awful mess. I came to realize that shit happens. It always has, and it’s always going to. Then I realized that what had happened to my life wasn’t the problem. The problem was my perception of my life. I was so stuck in a swamp of grief and fear and anger and resentment and loss that I failed to see the opportunities for all that my life could now become had I stayed in an abusive marriage that I knew I never should have entered into in the first place. That, in and of itself, is a lot to accept.

I spent a good portion of 2019 self-reflecting. Analyzing my decisions. Not just recent ones…the ones I’ve made my entire life. And I got to know myself. Like, REALLY know myself. I figured out my personal habits and where they stem from. I realized some of my major character flaws and worked on them avidly. I identified all of the negative mindsets that had been programmed into me. I gave up most of the things that were never good for me. I replaced those things with things that brought me joy and peace. I replaced self-loathing with self-love. I replaced entitlement with gratitude. I replaced resentment with acceptance. I replaced hate with (in the very least) understanding. And you know what…life became GREAT again!

It took a lot of work. A lot of pain. But I got there.

In retrospect, I’ve always had a great life. I’ve always had a loving and supportive family. I’ve always had a handful of extraordinary friends. I’ve always had strength and passion and curiosity. I’ve always had a comfortable place to live. I literally have had NOTHING in my life worth complaining about. But my perspective was so wrong for so long that I never truly realized how blessed I’ve been in this world. And because of my perspective I never even gave myself a chance to know what it feels like to be truly grateful.

So I guess the moral to this long rambling story is this: Perspective is EVERYTHING! Shit happens. Things change. People come and go. Nothing is forever. Accept it. Own it. Appreciate it. Deal with it. Laugh. Cry. Dance. Sing. Explore. Do your best. But NEVER allow circumstances and unfavorable outcomes take you to a place so low that your entire mindset changes. Because it’s easy to get stuck there. And incredibly challenging to get out.

So if you’re feeling some kind of way in life right now and wondering if things will ever be good again, I challenge you to change your perspective. I’m willing to bet that if you do miraculous things will start happening for you. Actually, I promise they will! ❤